


'Tis Better To Have Loved And Lost Than Never To Have Loved At All

by Smartinski



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-29
Updated: 2018-08-30
Packaged: 2019-07-04 08:52:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15837909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Smartinski/pseuds/Smartinski
Summary: And that was it. They were driving away from him, inhisjeep, leaving him behind in a strange new place. On his own.Scott took one look at her and he knew. So did the girls. They just knew.Scott looked disappointed, Kira looked sorry, and Malia...Malia hit the nail right on the head.“For two people that have survived countless of near death experiences against things that should have stayed in nightmares, you’re both fucking cowards.”Stiles and Lydia didn't confess their feelings.





	1. Prologue

There’s nothing quite like the feeling of going through life, day to day, living with the fact that there was a moment, a _chance_ , that you didn’t take.

The feeling that sits in the pit of your chest and it’s always there. Sometimes it can be ignored, but it’ll hit you. Maybe on your lunch break, or driving, or in the middle of the night. It’s bearable in those little moments, controllable.

But when the feeling is at its all high, when it hits you worse, is when the chances you didn’t take are standing in front of you like an old song. It comes washing over you like a nostalgic, agonizing wave.

And when you see that chance, when you stare at it, it hurts. It _aches_. It makes you realize that living with the burden of never taking it actually hurts more than what you imagined if you _did_ take it. The fear of pulling on that thread, of seizing the moment, it’s nothing compared to the pain of letting the thread go.

Lydia hates it.

She bares it, but hates it.

It makes her feel like her life isn’t as complete and successful as it feels, or how it looks to others. It makes her miss her childhood more, it makes her pine for time to go back, just to the point where she could have taken that chance.

Back to the time when they _both_ could have taken that chance.

So many opportunities, wasted on two cowardly people.

She could have said it. Looking back, she really could have.

Everytime she thinks about their hands locked with fear, eyes glued to each other when Stiles could see the ghosts on horses and Lydia could not. When they both knew what was going to happen next.

He was about to say it. To this day, Lydia’s _sure_ of it. It was on the tip of his tongue, he was screaming the three words through his eyes, but then he was gone. He was gone and she couldn’t remember.

The perfect time when she could have whispered _I love you_ was the moment he was zapped back into existence (through a rift created by their pure _connection_ , may she add. Yes, that could have been a perfect time to declare their feelings).

She could have said it then, but her tongue felt too heavy and her heart felt too large so she just took his hand and they ran from the school.

A really good time to have said it would have been before they all left for college. It would have been a lovely end to the summer. A huge pick-me-up from the hell of a year they experienced. When the pack spent the weekend at the beach, drinking beer, doggy paddling in the sea, listening to Stiles’ 80’s playlist on repeat. 

Lydia can still picture it; her and Stiles sitting side by side on a blanket, their backs leaning against his jeep, watching their friends running through the water as the sun was setting. A Desperados in one hand, and their free hands resting on the blanket, fighting the urge to entwine their fingers together.

She can still remember the feel of the sand beneath her, the warmth of the air and the smell of salt. She can remember the way Stiles’ eyes lit up everytime she smiled or laughed. She can remember watching Malia on Scott’s shoulders, Mason on Liam’s, waist deep in the water. She remembers the stupid bet her and Stiles had made on who would win. 

(She won that bet and she’s been so smug about it ever since).

The look in his eyes as the day turned to night. The way he studied her face. He was going to say it. _She_ was going to say it. She remembers the goosebumps on her arms. It was going to come out.

But then the clouds formed, and the sea shifted, and the lightning striked.

Kira was home.

And then Lydia was busy. She was catching up with an old friend, she was clinging onto the time she had left with her mother. She was packing, she was planning, she was preparing. They were all leaving.

Stiles went first.

Scott, Malia, Kira and herself drove him to D.C. They stopped at every tourist spot along the way, they ate every bit of junk food they could get their hands on, they stayed in every crappy motel (purposely avoiding Glen Capri), and they drunk so much alcohol that Lydia knew she’d have to undergo a week long detox before starting college herself.

They laughed _so_ much. They gained so many new memories, the _best_ memories. It was the most fun Lydia had ever had.

Their last motel stop - near Virginia beach - was the perfect send off. They walked the pier, went on rides (Scott threw up), Malia got to try rollerblading for the first time, Lydia purchased a cute rug from a lady’s stall along the beach walkway that stayed on the floor of her dorm room until the day she left college.

They drunk more alcohol around the tiny pool in the motel. Scott and Malia were instructed to drink thrice the amount of Kira, Stiles and herself. It was relaxing.

For the first time in _years_ , Lydia felt like a normal teenager.

Her and Stiles laughed the most, which she finds ironic, as they were usually the least to smile (the most damaged of the bunch, what could you expect).

They hid their laughter at the awkwardness of Malia blurting out to Kira that she had been sleeping with Scott, they laughed silently (and failed) on the floor outside their motel room after forcing the three in there to talk it out, and they laughed as they ran from security who was probably about to tell them off about the noise level.

They hid next to the shitty vending machine that held one Hershey’s bar which was half hanging off, three bottles of flavoured water that looked a bit discoloured and a pair of lacy underwear hanging from the top row. They laughed at that way too much and spent a solid hour coming up with ridiculous theories of how the underwear managed to get there in the first place.

Then the laughter died down and the night was quiet, and they both could have said _something_. Their knees were knocking and Stiles’ fingers were brushing against hers and his eyes were dancing in the moonlight, never leaving her face. They could have said something. But Malia and Kira came walking over with puffy eyes, however they were smiling and then Scott joined them and the previous conversation between the three seemed to have cleared the air and they jumped in on the theories of the mysterious vending machine underwear.

The last one was Lydia’s fault. She’ll put her hands up to this one. She’ll take the blame for it.

He was going to say it. This time for definite, and nothing was going to stop him.

They’d reached his dorm, they’d unpacked his stuff, he’d said his goodbyes to Malia and Kira, he hugged Scott for what seemed like an entire decade, and their friends left the two of them standing outside the jeep, as if they knew. Of course they knew.

He was about to say it, he was ready.

But in that moment, Lydia realized that she wasn’t.

So she hugged him with all that she could and placed her lips near his ear.

“If you’re about to tell me something, please don’t.” She whispered. “Because if you do, I won’t get in that car. I won’t leave.”

It stayed silent for too long, and right then and there, Lydia _knew_ she’d broken Stiles Stilinski’s heart.

But, with the next sentence, he broke her heart, too.

“We can’t have that.” He whispered back with a shaky tone. “You have a fields medal to win.”

She didn’t reply. She stayed silent. It was what they were both best at. 

She simply blinked back one tear or two, kissed him so lightly on the cheek and broke the hug.

He was clinging to her hand like a lifeline. Like he was bound to her.

Stiles had tears in his eyes and Lydia knew she needed to go before she crumbled in front of him.

“I’m going to miss you, Stiles.”

“Not as much as I’ll miss you.”

He finally let go, and Lydia couldn’t undo her decision of leaving it brushed under the carpet. She had to see this one through.

And, as she walked to the passenger door of the jeep, he called out to her in a typical cover-up-pain-with-comedic-relief Stiles Stilinski fashion.

“Don’t go befriending any other tall, lanky, sarcastic white boys. I’ll be so pissed.”

She turned to him and smiled. It was pure, it was nice, he was smiling back.

“I give you my word. You’re one of a kind, Stilinski.”

And that was it. They were driving away from him, in _his_ jeep, leaving him behind in a strange new place. On his own.

Scott took one look at her and he knew. So did the girls. They just knew.

Scott looked disappointed, Kira looked sorry, and Malia...

Malia hit the nail right on the head.

“For two people that have survived countless of near death experiences against creatures that should have stayed in nightmares, you’re both fucking cowards.”


	2. Chapter 2

"Your facial expression is telling me you have good news."

Lydia stares at her boss from across his desk. It's first thing in the morning, but she's wide awake and excited and nervous and she is really hoping for this meeting to be the news she's expecting.

And Lydia Martin is known for getting what she wants. Most of the time.

"Well, Lydia. What can I say." Her boss leans back in his chair with a tired smile. He's not as awake as herself. "It's all going your way. Congratulations."

She freezes with hope. "Are you saying-"

"You've been assigned a team of your own in a newly built lab, just like you wanted."

She actually grins (she rarely does this) and crosses her fingers under the desk.

"And the newly built lab is downtown in Beacon Hills, _just_ like you wanted."

"No way."

"Way." Her boss grins and sips his coffee. "The board were more than happy to meet your requirements. So, good-bye Massachusetts and hello California."

Lydia doesn't like to admit to anyone, not even her mother and her friends that she misses Beacon Hills.

It's not that she misses the _place_ \- apart from the quietness, her home, the mall - no, she misses her life there. She misses everyone and she wants to go home.

It's even better that her dream job will be ten minutes down the road. And she's being promoted. _And_ the building and the equipment will be brand new and top of the range.

And she gets to go home.

She tells her mother and Malia. (Scott messages her ten minutes later so Malia must be spreading the word fast. Kira messages not long after).

It isn't until the night before Lydia's flight that she finds out. She's fed up of packing so she takes a break and checks her social media.

Stiles is in a relationship.

It's not as painful as Lydia had imagined it to be. Perhaps it's because she knows that deep down it won't last. Perhaps this girl isn't the one. Or perhaps Lydia has the slightest, _tiniest_ bit of hope that she and Stiles still have a chance. Maybe.

Maybe they'll both suck it up and tell each other how they feel. Maybe they'll carry on as usual and dance around the thing.

Knowing them, probably the latter.

Lydia doesn't mean to be nosey, she just wants to know what's waiting in Beacon Hills when she returns. (She's one-hundred percent being nosey, she's Lydia Martin).

His girlfriend is called Hayley. Her father is Stiles' coworker and they met at a work thing. She has blonde hair and blue eyes and she's very pretty. _Really_ pretty.

Lydia digs deeper - she wants to stop, she really does - and finds out they've been in a relationship for a week or so. She was tagged in a photo with Stiles and Scott the other day. (This riles Lydia up even more. Scott is _her_ friend, not-)

She slams her laptop closed and mentally scolds herself for being so rude and petty. She carries on packing.

**\- - - - -**

"You told me you were packing lightly."

Lydia hears her voice when she leaves the airport and steps into the sticky Californian weather. She looks up.

"I think we need a raincheck on your definition of "packing lightly"." Malia raises an eyebrow.

Lydia looks down at the two suitcases and carry-on bag she's dragging along with her. "This _is_ packing lightly. I have a transit van bringing the rest of my stuff tomorrow."

Malia gawks at her and pushes herself off of her car. "Well, then. It's lucky I drove the truck."

"It's also lucky you have super strength. These cases weigh a tone." Lydia smiles smugly, rolling the cases to the back of Malia's truck.

Malia mutters something under her breath, places the cases in the back (she's prepared to launch them but Lydia yells at her as they're designer) before staring across at Lydia. "Not even a hello?"

Lydia rolls her eyes. " _Hello_."

A grin spreads on Malia's face. "God, I've missed you."

Then Lydia's standing on her tiptoes and they're both squeezing the life out of each other and squealing then pretending like none of this happened when they get into the car.

"I have so much to update you with, you've missed lots." Malia turns down her radio and drives out of the airport and onto the highway.

"I have?"

"Well, not _loads_." Malia thinks for a second. Looks in her rear-view mirror. "Come to think of it, not a lot has happened in a year. This town is so boring. _I'm_ so boring. When did I become so boring?"

Lydia laughs and rolls down the passenger window. "How's your dad?"

"The same old dad. I'm still helping him run the shooting range. I'm sharing a room with Apollo. Who snores when he sleeps. And farts. Did I mention the room is the size of a closet?"

"No luck finding a place?" Lydia asks whilst looking out the window.

Malia sighs. "No. Everything's _so_ expensive. And as much as I hate that dog, I kind of like living with my dad. Feels like we're making up for lost time. Maybe you could help me build a larger room."

"Yeah. Let me just stick on my overalls and bring along my toolbox." Lydia rolls her eyes.

"Okay, so you don't own overalls but you most definitely own a toolbox. I wasn't born yesterday."

In a couple of hours, they try and cover what Lydia has missed (Scott and Kira reconciling, Isaac returning to Beacon Hills and Liam kind of falling in love with Theo - but in Malia's words, "they're totally boning") and they reach the Martin household. Her mother's already outside when they pull up.

"Girls! You're here. How was the flight, sweetie?" She's running to the car in her heels so Lydia saves her the trouble and meets her half way with a hug.

"I slept. It was amazing."

"Malia, thank you for picking her up."

"Natalie, I won't lie; I was kind of hoping you'd make it up to me by cooking those really tasty dinosaur shaped chicken nuggets I like so much. You still got some in your freezer, right?"

Natalie and Lydia watch Malia stroll into the house before Lydia's mother turns to her and squeezes her shoulder. "I'm so glad you're back. She has become the second daughter I never asked for."

Lydia pulls in her lips and holds back her laughter.

Malia pops her head out of the kitchen window. "I mean, there's a couple of packs left. That's kind of not good enough, Mrs Martin, but it will do. It will do."

**\- - - - -**

"You know, you're really smart, Lydia. But this is a very bad idea."

Lydia rolls her eyes and ignores Malia before knocking on the very large metal door. "You didn't have to come."

"Of course I did." Malia snaps. "He cannot be trusted and you may need reinforcements."

Lydia raises an eyebrow at Malia and then turns to Kira. The kitsune responds with a sheepish grin.

Before anyone can say anything else, the metal door slides open and Peter stands there with his famous smirk.

"Good morning, ladies."

Malia growls. Kira waves awkwardly.

"Well, seeing as everyone's in a wonderful mood..." Peter sighs. "I guess we'll get this over quickly."

Lydia's not actually listening and proceeds to walk past Peter into the apartment. She looks around at the empty space and...kind of falls in love.

Peter follows her. "I had the floor re-done completely last month. Double-glazed windows, fully equipped kitchen-"

"I'm putting in my own kitchen.”

"-which can be changed, phone line and router installed, brand new pipework and the roof has been refurbished - but the hot tub isn't included."

Lydia turns on her heels. "How much per month?"

"A thousand."

Lydia folds her arms and cocks her head.

"Nine hundred."

Lydia purses her lips.

Peter laughs. "I'm not agreeing to any lower. I had this whole building shaped up and trust me, it wasn't cheap."

Lydia fakes a yawn.

"Eight hundred and fifty."

"You left me bleeding out on the lacrosse field and manipulated my mind."

"Eight hundred."

"You created the Benefactor."

"Sub _conciously_. Not entirely my fault."

"You tried to kill Scott."

"I helped all of you fend off the Ghost Riders. _And_ I helped you attack the hunters."

"You used Malia to get to Kate."

Peter sighs. "Seven hundred."

Lydia smiles smugly.

"Throw in the hot tub and you've got yourself a deal." Malia adds.

Lydia looks at her. "I don't need the hot tub."

Malia scoffs. "Trust me, you need the hot tub."

**\- - - - -**

Lydia looks down at her list of items before locating the right aisle. "Okay, aisle fifteen."

Scott sighs. "Why is everything that you've picked located in the furthest aisles of this place?"

"I don't know, Scott. Why don't you go ask one of the employees?" Lydia deadpans.

They walk to the next aisle and as much as Scott _seems_ annoyed, he's more than happy to push the box-filled cart for Lydia as she directs them.

"So, when do you start your new job?" He asks.

"Next week. So I have plenty of time to settle in and catch up with everyone."

"Oh, I almost forgot!" Scott yells as Lydia walks down the aisle. "The pack is going for a meal tomorrow night. Do you wanna come?"

Lydia locates the item number, doing ever so well to hide the many emotions she's feeling. "Sure, I'd love to."

"Great, it'll be nice to get us all in one place. The parents won't be there but I'm sure my mom said she wanted to plan dinner at some point." Scott helps her put the cardboard box onto the cart.

"How is your mom?" Lydia asks.

"She's great. _Really_ happy actually."

"Does that have to do with a certain someone...?" Lydia smirks as she locates the next aisle.

Scott groans. "Honestly, it's still weird for me. I'm glad she's happy - heck, I'm glad _Argent's_ happy. But-nope. Still too weird."

Lydia laughs. "Scott, you dated your best friend's ex-girlfriend."

Scott gasps. " _Briefly_. Briefly."

"The rules still apply."

"You know, I was kind of waiting for my mom and _Noah_ to start something."

Lydia turns to him. "Me, too! I was rooting for that from the start."

Scott laughs. "Funny how life plays out."

Lydia smiles, staring ahead. "Yeah, it's funny."

Scott halts and stares at the many boxes resting on the cart. “How the hell are we going to get all this to your apartment?”

Lydia stops in her tracks and pulls in her lips. She didn’t actually think this far. “I was only meant to be getting a couple of things, in my defence.”

Scott pulls out his phone.

"Who are you calling?"

He brings it to his ear. "Help."

“We don’t need help. You have super strength.”

“Oh yeah, because walking out of here carrying eight flat pack boxes won’t look suspicious at _all_.” Scott smirks. “Isaac?”

Lydia refuses to acknowledge her relief that Scott called Isaac instead of Stiles. Because it's stupid to get nervous. Absolutely ridiculous.

“We’re at IKEA and we need help.” Scott explains. Lydia can just about hear Isaac’s muffled reply. “I think we’re going to need more than two cars, can you please bring reinforcements?”

And...she's nervous again. It's extremely irritating.

“Who’s reinforcements?” She tries to keep her tone airy as Scott hangs up but she knows better; he's a goddamn werewolf and he’s on her heart rate like a moth to a flame.

“Relax. You’re going to have to see him at some point.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She carries on walking after flipping her hair and looking down at her list of items. “We just need to get the dresser and then we’re done.”

Scott wants to push, Lydia knows that. But she knows that he won't because he's had this conversation with her before and he knows that it will go exactly the same way this time.

So, he's a good boy and changes the subject.

“What’s the apartment like?”

“It’s nice. As much as I hate to admit it, Peter has exquisite taste.” Lydia’s eyes are on the shelves, locating the item number she needs.

"Oh!" He bursts again. "Did I tell you what happened when I went to see Isaac in France before he came home?"

"What, last year?" Lydia turns to him. He places the last box on the cart. "Malia filled me in, kind of. Monroe sent spies, didn't she?"

"We caught them following us in Paris but nothing ever came of it. Did you see anything suspicious while you were in Massachusetts?"

"Not that I can remember." They head to the checkout. "I won't lie; I blocked it all out and focused on college, and then my job. But I'm sure I would have noticed someone spying on me if it did happen. Maybe she's given up."

"No, she wouldn't give up that easy. She's waiting for us to relax."

Lydia laughs. "You're starting to sound like Stiles."

When they get outside with her many boxes, Lydia’s acting nonchalant as her eyes dart around the parking lot. It doesn’t take long to spot the blue jeep and the boy jumping out of it.

And as his feet hit the ground, the amount of time since she last saw him bounces around in her mind.

_Two_ years. Two goddamn years.

The last time she saw him was very briefly over the Christmas period back in 2015. But everyone was there, all around Mrs McCall's so the conversation was light.

The last time they had a proper face to face conversation was when they left him in D.C.

They continued messaging for the following year. Countless of texts, lots of phonecalls, a few Skype video chats here and there.

But then the video chats stopped, and the phonecalls were fewer.

And then the phonecalls stopped, and the ten messages a day turned into one message a day, which turned into maybe one a week.

Then it turned into none at all.

The last time their texted (Lydia remembers the text _exactly_. It was from Stiles and it read _'hang in there'_ after she sent him a very polite, empty message about her lecturer being a dick) it must have been around the middle of their second year.

So, yeah. It's safe to say it's been a fucking long time since she spoke to or saw Stiles Stilinski.

Her stomach is in bits. Her heart is hammering against her chest but then she remembers Scott is next to her and Isaac is slamming the door of his car and it’s going to be just fine.

As they approach, Stiles’ eyes are on all of the boxes and Isaac is rolling up his sleeves as he sees Lydia and he shoots her a smile. He’s definitely about to hug her but if _he_ hugs her then _Stiles_ has to hug her and Lydia can see Isaac doesn’t want to put anyone in that awkward position. He gets it.

They _all_ get it. Lydia's frustrated and grateful all at the same time.

“So, let’s address the issue everyone seems to be happily ignoring.” Stiles speak up, eyes squinting in the sunlight. His hair’s longer. Quite messy. It’s nice. They haven't seen each other in two years.

“What’s that, Stiles?” Scott asks.

“Oh, nothing. Just the small, minor fact that Lydia is renting an apartment from the devil himself. What were you thinking?”

Lydia folds her arms. “I could say the same about your pet Roscoe over there. At this point, the thing is just going to stop working. No, we’re way past that point by now. It’s going to explode - _combust_ where it’s been so overworked.”

“Roscoe will go when I take my final dying breath. And last time I checked, my jeep is saving your ass because Lydia Martin under-analyzed the situation and bought half of IKEA.”

Lydia shrugs, stepping past Stiles. “I do have two supernatural creatures with me to help, but I suppose while you’re here you could lend a helping hand.”

Isaac walks next to her with a small smile. “I've missed your sass. No one's on my level around here.”

**\- - - - -**

“Alright, Lydia. Second issue of the day.” Scott pipes up as he carries a box over his shoulder. They’re standing in the lobby of Peter’s building, Scott and Isaac carrying a box each while Stiles and Lydia balance a large one between them.

Lydia follows Scott’s line of sight and pulls in her lips. Oh. “Ah, the elevator’s not working. A minor detail I forgot about.”

“Lydia, are you kidding me?” Stiles yells across to her, tilting the box slightly. Lydia snaps the box back up so it’s level.

“Stiles, I swear to god. We are balancing a bag full of ornaments on this box and if they fall off and brake, guess who’s paying for them?”

“Isaac. Definitely Isaac.”

Isaac scolds. "I think I actually hate you."

“Guys, we can do this." Lydia sighs. "We have handled a lot worse than carrying boxes up to the top floor of a building -”

“The top _floor_?!” Stiles squeals.

“Get a grip." She snaps at him. "We can do this.”

They mutter and moan (mainly Stiles) and begin the disastrous trek. It’s not long before Scott and Isaac are obviously way ahead and Lydia’s fingers are beginning to sting.

“Lydia, I’m being serious. Have you thought this through?”

“Stiles, I’ll be fine. Yes, Peter’s a shitty person who’s done shitty things, but somewhere in his icy soul he loves his daughter and will do pretty much anything for her, which means he'll help her friends. Besides, he earns money, I save money. It’s a win/win situation.”

The sound of Isaac muttering from above as he hits a wall echoes around them.

“I know it’s a good deal but just be careful. He’s an unpredictable son of a bitch.”

“You don’t think I know that? Steer to the right.”

“I can’t steer to the right, there is a brick wall in the way.” Stiles bites back.

“You’ve managed to steer to the right the last two halls we’ve passed.” Lydia blows a strange of hair from her face.

“I hope you’ve noticed that I’m carrying most of the weight here.” Stiles looks up at her, nostrils flaring.

“And I’m in heels. Suck it up.”

The box scrapes along the wall and gets stuck a few times but they get it in the end and are manoeuvring up the next flight of stairs.

“Hey, you grew out your nails.”

Lydia stops huffing and puffing and looks at Stiles who’s looking at her long, healthy fingernails. She’s completely caught off guard.

“Yeah, well, a lot of things change when you’re not sleepwalking every other night and waking up stuck in a ditch with mud and cuts all over your hands and feet.”

Stiles falls silent.

Okay, she pushed it a bit far. Only a little.

“You grew your hair out.”

He looks up at her and blinks. “Yeah. It was kind of an accident at first. And by accident, what I mean is I was too lazy to go get a haircut.”

Lydia smiles. “It suits you.”

_They haven't seen each other in two years._

“Thanks.” Stiles smiles back, his eyes diverting to the bag that keeps sliding about on the box. “FYI, I’m definitely not paying for anything that breaks. That’s on you.”

**\- - - - -**

They get everything into Lydia's apartment and Stiles goes down to grab the last bag. Lydia makes tea for everyone while Scott and Isaac start unpacking the first box.

"Rage!" Stiles yells as he enters the apartment with the last bag. "Rage is what I'm experiencing right now."

Lydia stirs the tea and looks up. "What?"

"So, Lydia. As I go to retrieve the final bag of doom, guess who I see downstairs?"

"Do I really have to guess?"

"A man who has come to fix the _elevator_."

Scott holds in his laugh. Isaac doesn't even try.

Lydia grins. "Timing is a funny concept, isn't it."

Stiles laughs sarcastically. "It really is."

She slides his cup across the counter and he seems to calm down once he sees the beverage. She takes a sip of her own. "So, what do you boys think?"

Scott stands up straight and looks around. "It's nice. Real nice."

"I thought it would have the same vibe as Derek's old apartment but it doesn't. I don't feel like an Alpha pack is going to waltz in and attack us." Isaac adds.

Lydia's face deadpans. "Thank you, Isaac, for _that_ image. Go take a look around, if you want. There's another set of stairs in the bedroom that lead to the roof."

Scott wanders up the spiral stairs as Isaac takes a sip of his tea and checks out the kitchen. Lydia turns to Stiles.

"What's your opinion?"

"You value my opinion?" Stiles raises an eyebrow.

There's a slight punch in her gut. Too much time has passed for him to come out with a sentence like that.

Lydia rolls her eyes.

His face seems to soften and he seems like he's not so against the idea anymore. Only a little bit.

Then he grins. "It's got Lydia Martin written all over it."

_Well, I think you look beautiful._

Lydia smiles back.

After a few seconds, Scott's head appears at the top of the stairs.

"You have a _hot tub?!_ "

And _that's_ how the four of them ditch unpacking and end up in the hot tub enjoying the last couple hours of the sun.

Lydia lets her head lean back as the sun beams down on her face and the jacuzzi jets hit her back. "Malia was right. I needed the hot tub."

Isaac leans behind him to fetch his tea. "You know, in France-"

"Shut up, Isaac." Stiles mumbles with his eyes closed.

Lydia looks at the three boys. "Was this worth the blood, sweat and tears today?"

" _Oh_ yeah."

They drink their tea and relax profusely and wait for Malia and Kira to finish work. One phone call and the two girls are there in a flash and joining them in the hot tub.

" _"I don't need the hot tub"_ , she said." Malia smirks.

"Shut up, Malia." Lydia mumbles.

Kira snaps a photo of all of them at some point. Lydia saves it as her lock screen almost immediately.

**\- - - - -**

Lydia's not nervous anymore.

Her first encounter with Stiles wasn't awkward like she anticipated and all her friends are happy to see her and they're going to go for a nice meal and she's not nervous anymore.

Until she meets Malia and Kira outside the bar.

"I'm going to warn you now." Malia stops Lydia in her tracks. "Stiles' girlfriend is coming."

_Great._

"Why is that an issue?"

Malia squints at her and Kira blushes. "It's not! It's not...just thought we'd give you, er, a heads up."

Lydia sighs and smiles at Kira. "Thank you for thinking of me. I'm hungry. Can we please go inside?"

The boys are already there and have secured them a large enough table. Scott's already got a round of drinks lined up as Lydia takes a seat and Mason leans over the table to give her a hug.

When Stiles returns from the bathroom and takes a seat next to Lydia, she's staring at Liam as he explains something to Corey.

She leans into Stiles. "What are your thoughts on-?"

He's already followed her line of eyesight and grumbles. "Don't. Don't even say it."

"But I have _so_ many questions. When did it happen?"

"Shortly after Theo betrayed us all and tried to kill Scott. And my dad. _And_ you."

"You're leaving out a minor detail in that timeline."

Stiles scoffs. "So what, he helped us fight off the hunters."

"And the Ghost Riders."

"What, so we have to forgive him because he grew a spine? Have _you_ forgiven him?"

It's Lydia's turn to scoff. " _God_ , no."

They stare at Liam a little more without being caught before Lydia tilts her head. "What does Scott think?"

Scott hears this. He leans into the other side of Stiles. "I hate it."

Lydia nods. "Noted."

Lydia catches up with Mason and Corey and Liam tells her how he's coaching the lacrosse team and she finally looks at the menu and gets stuck between the steak burger or the chicken salad and she's about to ask Stiles for his opinion when she walks in.

"I'm so sorry I'm late, I got held up at work."

Lydia looks up. Sees the blonde. Her hair's falling out of her bun and she's in a two piece which shows off her incredible figure and she's drop dead _gorgeous_.

Scott stands up to let Stiles out of the booth and Lydia's never seen him move so quickly and he pecks his girlfriend's lips with a smile that once destroyed Lydia.

No, Lydia isn't nervous. She just feels like she's going to vomit all over the table.

Ignoring Scott's eyes which are staring at her in panic, she plasters on her best fake smile that she's known for pulling off extremely well and stands up.

Hayley looks at her and her eyes widen with joy. "You must be Lydia! I've heard _so_ much about you."

Lydia takes her hand and shakes it. "You have?"

Hayley laughs. "I swear, you're all these guys ever talk about. It's so good to finally meet you."

Lydia looks at Stiles. It seems that it's only just dawned on him that Lydia is meeting his girlfriend. She's glad he looks as awkward as she feels.

They all take a seat (Stiles sits next to Hayley, and no it doesn't sting) and start conversation once more and Lydia dives straight in and starts a conversation with Hayley because the most important thing she learned from school was manners (and not being a complete bitch).

Another thing she finds out about Hayley is that she is nice. _Extremely_ nice. So nice that if she wasn't Stiles' girlfriend she would most probably be very good friends with her. Heck, it happened with Malia, it could happen with Hayley.

"So, what work was keeping you from the rat pack this evening?" Lydia asks with a smile.

"Oh, I work for the local homeless charity in HR. They work heavily with the church that I attend."

Of course she does.

"Wow. That must be-"

"Very rewarding." Hayley chuckles in agreeance.

Lydia finds herself still stuck between her two options from the menu when they all go back to deciding and she hates herself for looking up at the wrong time.

"What was that burger we had last time we came here?" Hayley mumbles to Stiles, placing an arm around his bicep.

Stiles thinks for a second before realization kicks in and he's smirking. "You mean the time we-"

"Don't say it out loud!" Hayley whispers with a giggle.

And that's enough for Lydia.

"I think it's my round." She stands up with a smile and scoots over Scott and Isaac. "Hayley, what do you drink?"

Stiles looks up. "The same as me."

Of _course_ she does.

She finds herself sitting on a stool at the bar, remeniscing to when she thought this was going to be completely fine. Oh, how naive she was a few hours ago.

She's so fixated on the horrible feeling in her chest and trying to get the bartenders attention that she doesn't notice someone approaching her on her right.

"I am so sorry to interrupt your evening but I desperately needed an excuse to ditch my friends who are complete idiots and I told them I'd come over to hit on you."

Lydia turns to look at the stranger, ready to tell him to go where the sun doesn't shine but she takes one look at him and her words dissolve in her mouth.

He's blonde, tanned and must have previously been wearing a suit but he removed his jacket and loosened his tie and Lydia won't lie, it's working for her. Nethertheless, she'd rather go back to her table than tell him that.

But. But _then_.

It's as if a lightbulb has switched on above her head.

She needs a distraction.

And standing in front of her is the most _perfect_ distraction.

What great timing.

In a split second she decides if she's going to either a) take the short route and flirt until he asks for her number, or b) take the long route and play a game of feigning interest.

She decides on the latter. Got to keep them keen.

"I hate to break it to you, sweetheart, but I'm going to send you back to your group of idiotic friends - who look like they've all just been kicked out of a frat house - and I'm going to act as if this encounter never happened." She finishes her speech with a smile.

The stranger laughs - not mockingly - but as if he finds her funny.

"I totally understand - and I think it's wise of you - but can I least grab a drink before you banish me from the pride lands?"

She's warming to him. And she can see that he has very dark blue eyes. Almost black in this lighting. "Fine. I'll allow you this."

"Thank you for sparing me." He grins. "I'm Alex."

She looks at him with zero emotion.

He scoffs jokingly. Even flicks his head for dramatic effect. " _Not_ that it's any of your business."

Lydia allows a smile to settle on her lips. "Well, Alex, not that it's any of _your_ business...I'm Lydia."

"Lydia." He smiles. "Well, Lydia, can I buy you a drink?"

She sighs. "You ruined it."

"Sorry, let me try that again. Can you buy me a drink?"

She laughs, only slightly. "You know - looking at your group of friends - at first glance, you seemed so out of place in your shirt and tie. But the more you speak, the more it all makes sense to me. How long before you graduate high school?"

He laughs and holds a hand to his chest as if she'd wounded him. "That was quick. I'm impressed, Lydia. Totally offended and I kind of like it."

Once she finally orders her round of drinks for the table, she finds herself swapping numbers with this stranger. And when he shakes her hand good-bye and turns to smile at her one last time, Lydia pretends she doesn't see Stiles staring at them.

Instead, she goes back to the table and sits next to Isaac and realizes she didn't order food.

Stiles looks up at her and there's something different in his eyes. She can't pinpoint what it is.

"I ordered the stake burger for you. I knew deep down you wouldn't want the salad."

Lydia spends the next five minutes trying to remember whether she told Stiles what she was stuck between ordering.

She didn't.

**\- - - - -**

The distraction (which goes by the name of Alex) works _wonderfully_.

Lydia can make it through pack nights watching Stiles and Hayley snuggle on the sofa without feeling the need to throw up.

She can go to work and not deal with the burden of constantly thinking about Stiles and his longer hair.

She can scroll through social media and see photos of Hayley and Stiles without feeling the urge to cry. She only grimaces now.

It was working _so_ well.

Until Alex stops being a distraction and starts playing a larger part in her life.

He's attending his final year at UC Davis to achieve a bachelor's degree in finance and economics. (Scott actually regonizes Alex from his last year at UC Davis before he graduated).

He comes from Carson City, where his mother still lives.

He's younger than her - only by a year and a bit, which Lydia doesn't mind so much. He seems mature enough.

He makes her smile, he makes her laugh.

He _isn't_ supernatural. She doesn't think. She hopes not.

Alex turns out to be a great catch. And he absolutely fucking idolizes her.

She really didn't mean for it to happen. She wasn't looking for a relationship.

But the hookups when he came to visit his mother (maybe once a fortnight) turned into every weekend hookups. Then it turned into cooking breakfast the morning after.

_Then_ it turned into meeting halfway between Beacon Hills and UC Davis to go for food and hookup in motel rooms.

And then Lydia had lost all control by that point. He'd visit her at every chance he got (the journey's about an hour and a half, baring in mind) and he'd cook for her and take her to fancy restaurants and they'd spend time together in her apartment and he'd meet her on her lunch breaks to sit in the park and catch up even though it had only been a couple of days since they saw each other last.

And...

And that's how she got here. Standing outside Mrs McCall's house holding Alex's hand, and she's about to introduce him to not only her mother, but her entire family and friends.

Her heart is racing when the door opens and Melissa is grinning at them both and Lydia's gripping Alex's hand way too hard but he says nothing. Nothing at all.

Alex is a charmer, to say the least. Lydia's mother absolutely loves him. Melissa loves him, Noah loves him, Lydia even sees Argent crack a smile when Alex has him in a conversation.

He gets along with Scott very well, Kira easily, Isaac surprisingly well, and by the look on Malia's face, she approves.

Stiles doesn't speak to him that much.

He's not rude - at _all_ \- he shakes Alex's hand with a polite smile, maybe too eagerly. But as soon as Alex is about to start a conversation, he makes himself busy. He pretends Melissa's calling him from the kitchen. He fakes a phonecall with his girlfriend who couldn't attend.

He is trying though, as much as Lydia knows he can, and that's good enough for her.

The look in Stiles' eyes, though, whenever her and Alex so much as stand _next_ to each other...yeah. That look, she cannot deal with.

This causes her to avoid eye contact with Stiles for the whole evening (as best as she can), because that looks makes her want to run into the bathroom and cry.

She wonders if she looked the same when she met Hayley for the first time.

But they all make it through the meal alive. That's all that matters.

It's really, _really_ nice to be in a room with everyone she loves, just talking and catching up. Because they're pretty much all adults now (as adult as they can be) and it feels more mature but just as fun. It's a nice stage in Lydia's life, this.

Later on that night, once Lydia and Alex are in bed in her room (he's staying for the weekend and she's trying not to smile at his toothbrush next to hers in her bathroom) and her head's on his chest and he's subconsciously tickling her arm, he exhales and she looks up at him.

"What?"

"Nothing."

She uses her elbows to prop herself up. "Seriously, what?"

Then he stares at her, really stares and his lovely blue eyes are admiring her and he smiles. "I was just thinking."

She cocks an eyebrow. "About what?"

"That I'm really glad I chose to leave my friends and stand by the bar with you."

He's not a distraction any more.

He's now an invariable in her life and she doesn't think he'll be leaving any time soon.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for the heartbreak I'm about to ensue with this story.
> 
> Have fun!


End file.
